Its been Three Long Months…

Learning to live without our Goose

This is a post about our “Goose.”  She was the best girl, and we miss her deeply – more than anyone could understand. I am about to put down all the memories I have of her here in this giant list.   I want to make sure, for posterity’s sake, that these memories are recorded so they will never be lost to the sands of time.

It is been three months since we lost our Lucy. Three hard months. While it has begun to get better, my thoughts continue to return to Lucy and how much we miss her and how much she meant to us. A day does not go by without thinking about her; I don’t want that day to come where I don’t think about her (but I know it will).

That is how life works. The so-called “circle of life” is a remarkable thing. So many have come before us in so many will come after. But, each of us are important, special, unique and deserving of remembrance.  The same is true of our pets – all animals really.

So, we come now to my memories as I’ve recorded them over these last months. There are so many more, and I will endeavor to add to this list as time goes by.  I don’t want anything to be left out, but inevitably they will be.  I’ll do the best I can, though.

Here it goes:

She loved to sit by my side and on the arms of our chairs and couches. She was so regal.

1. I remember her “huffing and puffing”. It was such a cute thing to see. She did this when she was excited and was thinking about moving to the next stage, which would be to begin barking. She was not much of a barker, though. She would usually only bark when she was with our other girls.
2. One of my favorite memories of her is when she would watch from the window as I left the house, or when I was coming home. If the curtain was closed, she would push it aside and sit there and watch. She was quite the watchdog. I also remember her watching from Michelle’s office. We would set up an ottoman so that she could lay there and be at just the right height so she could easily see out the window. She could lay there and watch the day go by for hours. When we first got her, in Loveland, we noticed that she loved to watch through the hole in the fence at the neighbor’s yard. She continued that in our next yard with the fence. When we moved to Lynnwood, she would lay on the deck and watch the neighbors in the street from her perch on the side of the house. She loved it, and we loved it.
3. I loved how she would wait for me before she would go downstairs in the morning. She would sit by the door and stare at me until I acknowledged and then went downstairs with her. Such a good girl.
4. Here in Mount Vernon, since we did not have the fence, we spent an inordinate amount of time taking our girls outside to go to the bathroom. Sometimes, Lucy would be so engrossed in her bone-chewing that she would just take her bone with her outside while she “took a break.” It was so cute. Sometimes, she would drop the bone out there and we would have to remind her to get it – and she would.
5. I remember her way of getting my attention – she would claw at me or paw at me so that I would give her attention when she was laying down.
6. She had a way of giving a stern look that said “it is time to do what you said you would do.” If I said we were going on a walk, she would expect that to happen and if it did not within a reasonable amount of time I would get one of those looks.
7. As part of her watching activities, sometimes she would see a car or people or a dog and then she would run to the next window to watch (or bark) them progress through the neighborhood. She was smart and loved to keep an eye on things.
8. When she wanted to play, she would throw her rump in the air and get her face down by the carpet. She could be very playful, even as she grew older and even near the end of her life.
9. I remember her always getting her bone in chewing it when she knew I was coming home. I don’t know what it was, but she would get in a good mood and get her bone and start chewing it before I even walked in the door.
10. When she wanted my attention, it was not uncommon for her to place her chin on my leg. If I was sitting at the table, she would do this as a way of begging. Usually it was when she wanted something, and it was so adorable. Your will to deny her would evaporate at that time.
11. She could be so stubborn. When on a leash, walking, she could stop this right in the middle of the street if she did not want to go where you were taking her. It was a very endearing quality, most of the time.
12. When I took her on a walk, she knew every house where a dog lived that had ever barked at her. She would remember that house and as we approached it she would look for that dog. Very good memory, and she was a great walking companion. When she would see that dog, she would of course “huff and puff.”
13. Words to describe her: stoic, protective, watchful, graceful, beautiful – especially her bronze eyes (very striking).
14. When we went to bed each evening, Lucy would decide which of us she chose to sleep with on that particular night. Usually by morning, she would be at my feet. But she definitely shared the love.
15. She could have a one-track mind. For instance, when we would hike, she was so happy sniffing and tracking things that she basically would not drink water. It would worry us constantly. For this reason, heat was her enemy (but she still loved the warmth).
16. Laying in the sun. She loved it – almost too much. She could suffer from heat exhaustion very easily, so we had to watch her so that she did not overdo it. One time, in Phoenix, she did overheat while lying in the shade on a hot summer day. So, even when in the shade and not exercising she could have trouble in the excessive heat of the desert.
17. One of the unique characteristics that she had that I have never seen in any other dog was her need to walk along edges and on ledges – usually to avoid grass, but it was more than that. Sometimes she would need to walk around things in a particular way, kind of like a routine.
18. I remember when she was excited, and huffing and puffing, the hairs on her back with standout and she would look her meanest (which was not that me).
19. Michelle just reminded me today about how she would guard the little babies – the grandchildren. When they were little, she would hover over them like a mama. She would make sure all the other dogs stayed away from this little fragile baby. It was so cute; I think she would’ve made a great mama herself.
20. She actually loved other dogs. She would bark and get their attention. But really she was just interested in every dog that she ever saw. She wanted to meet them. Her barking and huffing and hair standing up were all for show – posturing.
21. I remember her curling up in pillows on the couch or on the bed like she was a cat. I especially remember how she would do this on our sectional, in the corner. She loved to be on the top of the pillow so that she could still see the whole room from up there.
22. She did not really like the rain. I think her coat did not give her much protection from the rain. We noticed that when she got wet, she could stay wet for a long time despite her short hair.
23. She loved to sleep under the blankets. She loved to be warm – maybe too much! We had to be careful that she did not overheat.
24. Michelle love to call her “scratchy face”. She was part Shar-Pei, so she had some wrinkles on her for head. But not much. She got all of the great characteristics of the Shar-Pei, but not many of the laws with that breed.
25. I loved how she would make a talking or a mouthing move to get me to keep petting her. It was so cute, so adorable. I miss her so much.
26. I remember how she would always duck her head when I went to touch her from the top of her head. It was kind of sad, because she came from a puppy mill and it always made me think that she had been mistreated before we got her. She did this for the rest of her life.
27. I remember her giving me “slow licks.” They were the best she would lay on my lap and lick my hand or my wrist in a very slow and deliberate way that made me know how much she loved me.
28. I remember how she loved to take her treats and run to her spot under the table between all the chairs where no one could get her. It was her safe place from the other dogs, where she could spend time enjoying her treats.
29. We remember how much she loved timber he was like her little boyfriend. And, timber loved her, to.
30. Her and Lexi became very good friends, and they had almost a mentor working relationship. Lexi was always very subservient to Lucy, but Lucy always treated her very well and looked after her.
31. She had a problem with a “watering mouth.” The first day that we went to get her, Sean and I could not stop her mouth from watering. We had paper towels and we were having to wipe it all up in the truck. She got a lot better as time went on, but this was a common thing in the car. I think it was a motion sickness type of thing. When we would go on trips we would always have to watch her closely when we started going around a lot of curves in the road. We would “talk her through” the rough parts.
32. She had a problem with pulling out of her collar when on a leash. We had to start putting a choke collar on her. That became her normal collar, because we did not want to lose her on walk. One time, in Lafayette, we were at a dog park when she slipped her collar and started running towards the road. We could have lost her in an accident then. After that episode, we decided we needed a different system.
33. Some of my fondest memories are of taking Lucy to work with me, usually on the weekend. She was a pretty good work colleague. She loved going because she knew that she would get to go on walks “down by the river.”
34. She came to love riding in the car with me, especially the truck. In the truck, she could sit in the back seat in the middle and see out front windshield better than in the car. She was great writer, and she went with me to a lot of different places. In Washington that heat is almost nonexistent, so we didn’t have to worry much about the car getting too hot. She would sit so quietly in the back of the pickup, when I went to the store. I don’t think anybody would ever know she was there. I never heard her bark at anyone while in the pickup when not attended.
35. On walks, she was an exceptional tracker. She loved to get that nose down to street level and take in all of the smells. She must’ve been half tracker.
36. She was very powerful and strong in her prime. She was muscular, and always in good shape. She was athletic, and able to make good jumps. She loved sitting in precarious positions, often on the arm of a chair or the top of the couch.
37. We remember her loving the blankets to be lifted up on the edge of the bed so that she could easily just jump in there from the floor.
38. She was just a great companion, period.
39. She loved to walk on the river with me, especially as a break from work. I loved it, too.
40. I’ll always remember her scratchy, prickly coat of hair.
41. She was so good with children. I will always remember that and love her for it. I know that all of the grand kids remember Lucy, and they loved her too. They always like to call her “Lucy goose.” Maybe it’s because we love to call her that, too. She was always the one that we trusted around children. When on walks, I always trusted her to let the little kids pet her without worrying. Even in her last days, she could be trusted always.
42. Everyone loved her. Anyone that met her loved her.
43. She loved to have her back rubbed. She would start dancing around if you got the right spot.

She’s left such an indelible mark on me. There is such a hole in my life right now without her. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fill it completely, but that’s okay. I’m just glad and thankful for knowing her and getting to share these many years of my life with her.

While it is very hard to write these memories down, it has to be done. I don’t want these memories to fade away, and I don’t think they will. That is especially true if they are recorded like this so that I can recall them from time to time as life goes on without Lucy.

     Rest well, my dear Lucy.  In time, I will see you again.